The first test 7dp3dt 12/20/2012
Freak out day... 8dp3dt
Got home took more tests...
10dp3dt (AFTER the call)
Later that night...
And the Mother Load...
Monday, December 24, 2012
Tests, Tests, & more Tests!
BFP gallery!!! See normal women take ONE pregnancy test and chuck it in the garbage like a used tampon. Not us IVF girls. No way. If it was acceptable to frame and hang my pee test(S), I would. I wonder when I will be able to get rid of these beautiful tests. I know I cannot keep them forever so what is just as good?? Pictures!!
The first test 7dp3dt 12/20/2012
Freak out day... 8dp3dt
10dp3dt (AFTER the call)
The first test 7dp3dt 12/20/2012
Freak out day... 8dp3dt
10dp3dt (AFTER the call)
Proven....
PREGNANT
That is right...I am pregnant. Pregnant, pregnant, PREGNANT. Can I say it again? Ok thank you...I'm pregnant!
I skipped Church yesterday because I was so nervous they would call while I was in there. Even though I wasn't expecting the call until 2pm. Thank goodness because they called at about 10:30 (right when Church gets out). I knew she was going to say I was pregnant so I don't know why I was so shocked and shaking as much as I was. I guess because that was confirmation. Hearing those words. Not just in my head but from another human beings mouth. I was trying to write down the beta number but I was shaking too much. Needless to say I wasn't able to get anything done yesterday for the first few hours after that. I could not focus and I couldn't wait for Joe to get home!
Some symptoms at this point were nightmares and very vivid dreams (although I always experience this on PIO). Hightened sense of smell. Charlie Horses! Which I alwayssss had when pregnant with Gia and only experience maybe 1 a year. I had it twice so I was beginning to wonder. Thirsty. Very very thirsty. But all of this is nothing that would've completely gave it away. At 5dt3dt I did feel something in my uterus. It was the most bizarre thing and it was kind of freaking me out. On the lower right side I felt burrowing. Exactly what you would expect implantation to feel like. I felt like a little mouse digging inside of me. It kind of tickled and was such crazy and exciting moment because I knew what was happening.
I skipped Church yesterday because I was so nervous they would call while I was in there. Even though I wasn't expecting the call until 2pm. Thank goodness because they called at about 10:30 (right when Church gets out). I knew she was going to say I was pregnant so I don't know why I was so shocked and shaking as much as I was. I guess because that was confirmation. Hearing those words. Not just in my head but from another human beings mouth. I was trying to write down the beta number but I was shaking too much. Needless to say I wasn't able to get anything done yesterday for the first few hours after that. I could not focus and I couldn't wait for Joe to get home!
Some symptoms at this point were nightmares and very vivid dreams (although I always experience this on PIO). Hightened sense of smell. Charlie Horses! Which I alwayssss had when pregnant with Gia and only experience maybe 1 a year. I had it twice so I was beginning to wonder. Thirsty. Very very thirsty. But all of this is nothing that would've completely gave it away. At 5dt3dt I did feel something in my uterus. It was the most bizarre thing and it was kind of freaking me out. On the lower right side I felt burrowing. Exactly what you would expect implantation to feel like. I felt like a little mouse digging inside of me. It kind of tickled and was such crazy and exciting moment because I knew what was happening.
Thursday, December 20, 2012
Could it be?
You know when you wait for something for so long and you think it's never going to come...and then it comes and you aren't sure how to react? That's what's going on. Is it real? Is it not real? Is this a joke? An evil trick? I've been down this road before so I have been robbed of letting my excitement show to its fullest extent.
Yesterday after work I went to the mall. I was in Express and I started to sweat. I couldn't get to the bathroom quick enough. Of course I got to the rest room and it was closed for cleaning so I had to scurry to another one. The whole time getting to the rest room (even though I was feeling like poo) I was smiling deep down because I was thinking to myself "oh my God, I am pregnant". I was violently ill in the bathroom. Then it dawned on me...I have the freaking stomach virus. A coworker had it on Monday and Tuesday but came in yesterday. I must have caught it because I was sick all night.
I woke up at 4:30 to use the bathroom and tested but didn't look at the test and placed it in the closet. I then tried to get back to sleep (with little success). Joe woke up at 5:30 and I told him I tested but I was scared to look at it and put it in the closet. I asked him to check it for me. He came back and said "I see 2 lines and I don't even have my contacts in yet". I got up and saw this...
It's crazy how a million things can run through your head in literally a split second. So for today, I am pregnant. Please let this be real. Please let me be pregnant for 37 more weeks. Please let us have a healthy baby. Please, please, please.
Yesterday after work I went to the mall. I was in Express and I started to sweat. I couldn't get to the bathroom quick enough. Of course I got to the rest room and it was closed for cleaning so I had to scurry to another one. The whole time getting to the rest room (even though I was feeling like poo) I was smiling deep down because I was thinking to myself "oh my God, I am pregnant". I was violently ill in the bathroom. Then it dawned on me...I have the freaking stomach virus. A coworker had it on Monday and Tuesday but came in yesterday. I must have caught it because I was sick all night.
I woke up at 4:30 to use the bathroom and tested but didn't look at the test and placed it in the closet. I then tried to get back to sleep (with little success). Joe woke up at 5:30 and I told him I tested but I was scared to look at it and put it in the closet. I asked him to check it for me. He came back and said "I see 2 lines and I don't even have my contacts in yet". I got up and saw this...
Monday, December 17, 2012
SNOW BABIES!
I still cannot believe it but Joe and I have TWO snow babies. I was told I would know on day 6 (which was yesterday) if any of the remaining embryos made it to freeze. I originally did not want to know whether any made it or not until beta. I felt that if they didn't it would ruin any hope I had for this cycle. I didn't get a call yesterday so I figured no news=no embryos. Well, I was wrong. I went in for my progesterone check this morning and I asked the nurse that drew my blood (because the front desk ladies are meanies) if no call meant no news. She checked with another nurse who said she would check for me. She came out and said "you transferred 2 on day 3 and 2 made it to day 5 to freeze". I pointed at myself as if maybe she wasn't talking to me even though we were the only ones in the hall together. I started to tear up immediately. She said "congratulations, they're really good ones too". Me? Frosties? Good? Crying as I think about it... My embryos have never gotten that far before. I am so proud to call them MY snow babies! Or, I guess OUR snow babies. I am trying to keep myself from being overly curious about them and asking about their grades. I figure they have to be rockstars to be able to freeze because those standards are normally pretty high at most places. I am over the moon right now and if this cycle fails, I have something wonderful to look forward to. I am confident that if our baby(ies) aren't implanting right now, they are among those in the freezer. I briefly wanted to kick myself in the butt for not waiting until day 5 to transfer but I have to trust that I made the right decision to do a 3 day transfer based on my past cycles. I hope at least one of the ones they chose to transfer was just as good. We will wait and see. In the mean time, I am dreaming about my snow angels :)
Friday, December 14, 2012
I'm pregnant.
Yesterday I became pregnant. Today I am pregnant as well. Being that with all my IVF's my embryos crap out on day 4...I may or may not still be pregnant tomorrow. My only hope is that they can thrive better in my uterus. I keep looking at and feeling my belly. I am so obsessed. You never would know that I've been through this so many times before. Because this is really only the 2nd 2ww that I was given hope. The first IVF I had such high hopes because I was a beginner. The 2nd IVF the blast they transferred was such poor quality that I knew it was over before it was even transferred. The 3rd IVF I was robbed of my 2ww. So right now I feel every emotion across the board. From gitty and excited to scared and nervous. We got a picture yesterday of the embryos they transferred. I am happy to have them but at the same time I have been analyzing and obsessing over them non stop. I don't think this is healthy for me to be doing. The Doc described them as "textbook" embryos. Well, my last RE described my embryo on day 3 as "textbook" too and guess what...I had nothing to transfer 2 days later. So, I take that compliment with a grain of salt.
Here are my babies. I think they kind of look like me :)
I can't help but think they both look completely different.
I'm much better today but yesterday I was feeling extremely stressed and irritable. I was also feeling super senstive. The progesterone is making me a sucker. I got well wishes from a couple of friends yesterday that truly brightened my day and made me smile (and cry). So thank you JuneBugs. I miss you and I'm happy you're still routing for me <3.
Beta...12/24/2012....
Here are my babies. I think they kind of look like me :)
I'm much better today but yesterday I was feeling extremely stressed and irritable. I was also feeling super senstive. The progesterone is making me a sucker. I got well wishes from a couple of friends yesterday that truly brightened my day and made me smile (and cry). So thank you JuneBugs. I miss you and I'm happy you're still routing for me <3.
Beta...12/24/2012....
PIO
In other news, I had to do my PIO myself this morning. I am so proud of myself when I do it alone. I was so excited!
Wednesday, December 12, 2012
Tomorrow's transfer day
Okay so I haven't had time to update because all this landed on the weekend. Friday I went in to see Dr. K and he said everything looked good and we were probably set for a Tuesday transfer. But he said we have to watch me closely and I will have to go into the NYC office Saturday and Sunday. I went in Saturday and he said everything looked great and I'd probably trigger tomorrow (Sunday). But then my estrogen level came back and they all of a sudden decided to tell me to trigger that night (Saturday). I was a little worried and nervous that all of my eggs may not be mature. The doc left my u/s pic up on the monitor so I decided to snap a picture. I thought it was cool since it's the most I've ever seen for myself on a scan.
So I triggered at 11pm on Saturday. I was able to do the Ovidrel in my tummy which was way cool. I usually do them IM and I hate those. So I go back into the city on Sunday (which by the way I found parking on the street both days! wahoo!) and I had an u/s and blood work. This time I actually asked the doc to county my follies. She counted 11 on the left and 7 on the right.
On Sunday I went with my BFF to go wedding dress/bridesmaid dress shopping. One of the bridesmaids says she needs the dress to be flowy because she plans on getting pregnant soon and she will be about 8 months pregnant for the wedding then. Well, let me just say it now in writing...mark my words...if I am not pregnant for this wedding and she is already 8 months along, I will jump off a bridge. Okay, maybe not jump off a bridge but would I be able to call out sick from my best friends wedding at least? Let's hope this doesn't happen. Anyways, the lady brought out a belly pillow to try on under the dress. I got to snap a picture of myself with the belly on. Every time I look at this picture my eyes tear up. I can't wait for this. I hope this is closer than I feel like it is.
Anyways, I had my retrieval on Monday morning at 11am. We were not so lucky to find parking on the street and had to pay $60 for 2 hours. My experience was so different from the last clinic. Not that the last one was bad. It's just that this place was so quick. I was really in and out. Super quickly. I felt much more crampy this time around but probably because I had much more eggs. They got 23 eggs. I was shocked to hear this. I couldn't wait for my fert report. I was expecting at least 15 but we only got 12. They say that's good but that's only 3 more than last time and last time all 9 arrested. Please, God, please let there be a good one in this batch. And please let that one be chosen to be transfered tomorrow. We are doing a 3dt and I'm very nervous. I need lots of luck.
So I triggered at 11pm on Saturday. I was able to do the Ovidrel in my tummy which was way cool. I usually do them IM and I hate those. So I go back into the city on Sunday (which by the way I found parking on the street both days! wahoo!) and I had an u/s and blood work. This time I actually asked the doc to county my follies. She counted 11 on the left and 7 on the right.
On Sunday I went with my BFF to go wedding dress/bridesmaid dress shopping. One of the bridesmaids says she needs the dress to be flowy because she plans on getting pregnant soon and she will be about 8 months pregnant for the wedding then. Well, let me just say it now in writing...mark my words...if I am not pregnant for this wedding and she is already 8 months along, I will jump off a bridge. Okay, maybe not jump off a bridge but would I be able to call out sick from my best friends wedding at least? Let's hope this doesn't happen. Anyways, the lady brought out a belly pillow to try on under the dress. I got to snap a picture of myself with the belly on. Every time I look at this picture my eyes tear up. I can't wait for this. I hope this is closer than I feel like it is.
Anyways, I had my retrieval on Monday morning at 11am. We were not so lucky to find parking on the street and had to pay $60 for 2 hours. My experience was so different from the last clinic. Not that the last one was bad. It's just that this place was so quick. I was really in and out. Super quickly. I felt much more crampy this time around but probably because I had much more eggs. They got 23 eggs. I was shocked to hear this. I couldn't wait for my fert report. I was expecting at least 15 but we only got 12. They say that's good but that's only 3 more than last time and last time all 9 arrested. Please, God, please let there be a good one in this batch. And please let that one be chosen to be transfered tomorrow. We are doing a 3dt and I'm very nervous. I need lots of luck.
Monday, December 3, 2012
Recap
Just making a note (since I forget everything) of my previous cycles...
IVF #1 Long Lupron Protocol 8r/5f
IVF #2 Antagonist Protocol don't remember!
IVF #3 Micro Dose Lupron Protocol 12r/8f
IVF #4 Long Lupron Protocol 23r/12f
IVF #1 Long Lupron Protocol 8r/5f
IVF #2 Antagonist Protocol don't remember!
IVF #3 Micro Dose Lupron Protocol 12r/8f
IVF #4 Long Lupron Protocol 23r/12f
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